a companion piece to tomism #0101: be a good goalie
…or How to make yourself the goalie
Many of the things necessary to position yourself as the goalie are similar to what is discussed in Entry #0101, just with a little twist.
Listen. If they are speaking to you (a member of the opposite sex) about certain issues regarding their relationship rather than the person they are in the relationship with, then you’re already one step closer to becoming their goalie. So be there for them and really listen.
Advise. Reiterate all the negative things they’ve said about their current goalie during your conversations. Repeat. This will show you are actually listening to what they’re saying while essentially lowering the current goalie’s standing.
Act. Taking what you’ve heard about what is lacking in their minds about the relationship, provide it for them little by little. Now don’t be an idiot and start pouring it on thick. It’s all about being subtle.
Make them smile/laugh. Do the little things their current goalie has all but forgotten about. Be the reason they smiled or laughed that day. The object here is to have them smile when they think about YOU.
Sex. No, you’re not going to have sex with them. At least not right now. But always incorporate sexual innuendo into casual conversation. You’re not trying to get yourself into the friend zone and this should make sure that doesn’t happen. If you think you’re already in the friend zone, this is a good method to climb out of that.
Patience. If you’ve done things correctly, they will initiate physical contact. You just have to wait for it. However, if nothing has happened and they continue to compare their loser of a goalie to YOU, they’re waiting for you to make the first move. So don’t be a dork and just get to it!
*Only applies if you are already within the social circle of the goal in question. Meaning, you need to be an acquaintance or friend and have direct contact with the goal. It is possible to work yourself into the social circle but will take additional time and adds another element not discussed.